Red Lefe Web Blog

Quick Question

2004-11-09T23:49:00.000-05:00

Did we have the election yet? I was up in the Adirondacks on an extended family reunion camping trip for several weeks. There was no TV since the daughter-in-law made us stay in some godforsaken cabin instead of the Econo Lodge ten miles away. Now I'm back and my TV only gets the Japanese language channel where they show all those soap operas that all seem like the same episode. I tried to watch in the rec room but Tabitha had on some disgusting show with the woman who's married to Howie Long the footballer.

I thought maybe the election hadn't happened yet since last time it took a long time before they settled on a winner. Please stop by and tell me when it is this year and also where we'll be having the voting. Didn't last time we have it in the Julius Irving library? I remember that because I waited in line for twenty-one minutes with a bad hip only to see that Norman had broken the voting lever before me (I know it was you Norman! You left your Mae West photo book in there!!) and the cookies they had set out were picked over to say the least.

Thanks!

A Modest Proposal

2004-09-20T00:00:00.000-05:00

Maybe they can add a circular "hoop" in the center of football uprights, then if they kick the ball straight through that small hoop the team gets not a standard 3 point field goal, but a special 5 point "super" field goal!

I Never Served With John Kerry

2004-08-25T09:39:00.000-05:00

But I want to say that Vietnam was a bad war. I knew it then, even though I didn't say anything, and I know it now. The Second World War was a good war. Korea, where I served, was somewhere in between. It was nothing like MASH.

So I don't know why he's so proud about killing people in a bad war. I wasn't even really in combat in Korea. Once, on I guess some kind of recon mission, I shot a sniper and it's been with me forever. She was a woman, too. I'm not saying I should go to jail for it or anything. Just, does that make me a hero or a better candidate for President?

I don't think so. But enough of my ramblings! Marie and I have (would you believe it?) dance class down at the mall. I won't be able to walk but I will be able to dance!

Last Night I Dreamed I Was 95

2004-08-20T00:21:00.000-05:00

And tonight I can't manage to sleep at all! It's a little spooky to be in the lab by yourself. Marie hasn't slept less than 8 hours in 55 years.

Here's to the New Mary Lou Retton. Only sixteen but can she jump.

Sam just sent another joke. A classic!

A Moral Question
One man said to another, "I didn't sleep with my wife before I got married. How about you?" The man replied, "I don't know. What was her maiden name?"

Swimming

2004-08-19T15:26:00.000-05:00

Last night I dreamt I was assigned to substitute teach in a deep suburban high school. It was conjoined with the local shopping mall cum town square. A festival of some kind was in progress. D. Elisabeth, my Late, was there and we had a great time (young we were, when we first met) with the rides and games and booths. After a strange cakey meal I went over to the school section and wandered more or less randomly into a room. It was an extracurricular club's meeting room. It was the White Students' Union and was dressed in Nazi banners and propaganda. The club was meeting. The mayor of the town, in his Kluxen robe, presided and most of the other prominent men of the town were there, as were many troubling jungen. I knew I could not leave immediately without arousing suspicion (although like most of us it would be a nice diversion to arouse anything now!) so I kept quiet and slipped out without making a stir. I had trouble finding her, she was skylarking by a funicular. I hurried her off muttering, like movies, about how we had to get out fast and quiet. It was the modern age, to be sure, but we got in a skyblue Nash Rambler and drove the bejesus out of there. How strange it is I rank this dream highly. For one I saw her again. For another I felt myself again, leaping, striding, and simply doing cleanly and surely, without stagger or caution. Are all our youths and younger selves to be forever entwined with the Nazis?

Anyone out there not heard my rant about those ridiculous TeamUSA outfits at the opening p-rade of the Sports Olympics?

It's All Melted

2004-08-08T22:21:00.000-05:00

Colonel, Marie and I got back on the movie bus and it was all melted. I put it back in the freezer and we'll see how well it hardens. Reminds me of a time in the war.

The movie we saw was The Village. If you ask me it was a bad story well told. At the risk of revealing the "twist" it's that nothing you thought was going to turn out one way really turns out that way. It's really something different. This is what they make movies about now.

Happy Bee-lated B-Day Norman!

2004-08-08T16:37:00.000-05:00

Hope your day was fine as the son and I were down in Myrtle Beach this week. Do you know that there are more golf courses there than anywhere in the country? I do not know if this claim is true, but the good people of Myrtle Beach claim it and seem to have little intention of providing adequate data to back it up. Still, there are many courses (including something called Mt. Atlantiticus that Brian dragged me to which has seven waterfalls. Seven! What a waste of heavily clorinated blue-ish water!) and I had Alaskan King crab for the first time since I was stationed on the Maryland coast during my brief Naval days. (And no Coates, you are not a Navy man for live, despite what you may have read or heard. We all have our youthful mistakes.)

Again, happiest of days Norman and look for a little surprise by your doorstep this evening! (I don't like frozen custard, so I hope you do.)

(Oh, Brian is my grandson and I took the title of this post from a birthday card I sent him last month. I don't think he will mind since he only uses the Internet to play games as far as I can tell.)

Hoppy Birthdoy!

2004-08-03T11:21:00.000-05:00

Those mosquito magnets don't work but I'll be there with fry-pats and turkey dogs!

Has anyone seen my Buchanan plaid lap blanket? I didn't take it on my trip and it isn't in my room. It would have been folded and draped over the back of my chair. If you really need it I can get another but you'll look pretty silly with that blanket everyone knows is mine. So you should give it back.

Happy birthday, Norman!

2004-08-03T10:27:00.000-05:00

Happy birthday!!!!!! As my mother use to say, "Till a hundred and twenty." (She said it in Yiddish, but I didn't think you'd understand that.)

Today is My 81st Birthday

2004-08-03T08:38:00.000-05:00

As you could probably see from the balloons. Yesterday the kids sent a "combination" present: a thing that looks like a barbecue that you use to drive mosquitos away. I think they call it a magnet because of how it repels. I'll be in the courtyard around sunset. Join me!

And on this birthday, it's time to reflect. Never has a man been so blessed to have been born and to continue living. I really feel that every week or two is a gift, and despite my complaining, a pretty good one. Especially when you consider all the love I get, especially in the nighttime from Marie. And the fact that it's in this beautiful country that represents everything that's good and decent, even if we make some mistakes.

God bless you all.

Delete

2004-08-02T15:15:00.001-05:00

I'm afraid my last message may be misinterpreted. If the administrator is available, I would like his help in deleting it. And if it offends, I would like to apologize. No harm was intended, just lighthearted humor.

Surprises

2004-08-02T15:15:00.000-05:00

Tabby,
Honest to goodness, you never looked like a Yid to me.
-Norm

Aloha!

2004-08-02T14:43:00.000-05:00

Well, Colonel, I for one was spirited off by my son and his ladyfrau to Europe for a few weeks. Now you know I haven't been there since right after the war and it was quite a thing to see my old haunts and be haunted by my old friends. When I was in England I developed the habit of watching cricket matches every weekend. Never learned the rules but loved that gallant useless waste of time. Ever since I've wanted to learn and maybe teach my kids or grandkids but now that's not really practical I suppose. At any rate let me tell you this, the game has changed! Less pastoral they don't even always wear their whites and it looks like NASCAR outfits they have on. Also the Boy and the Girl-in-Law took me to some sort of event and I saw Elizabeth Hurley in person. When it comes to Elizabeth Hurley's eyebrows, and I've noticed this over the years, film fanatic that I am, more is more.

Help Me

2004-07-27T20:34:00.001-05:00

Who else is getting cramps from the salmon?

Colonel

2004-07-27T20:34:00.000-05:00

I will walk with you tomorrow. I have had trouble sleeping, and when the dreams have come, they have been rigid and loud. Do you know what I mean? I've had to pace by the fridge, which is getting harder with the ankle aches. But I will walk with you tomorrow to the river, and if we catch a catfish I'll gill him with my knife.

God bless this Country and the democratic process! What we debate in peace they kill over in war!

This Place Is a Ghost Town

2004-07-27T20:18:00.000-05:00

Where is everyone these days? Can it be that families have come to take everyone away for the summer? I remember last summer, I think it was, every week they played the mah jong and the movies in the Great Hall. That colored fellow from the city would bring his dance troupe and they'd play the old songs on the boom box so we could dance with them. Last night I listened to my WWII book on the tape again and I swear there weren't hardly a sound on the whole floor. Who is here to walk with me and the nurse down to Pawtucket river tomorrow? I want to see the catfish jump before the summer ends. My step-son says the catfish don't jump anymore, but he's a damn fool. I would only call him a damn fool on the Internet, and no place else of course.

As you can see my keyboard problem is gone. For now.

Fauct

2004-07-18T20:50:00.000-05:00

Who is laving thir fauct on at night in th Arthur Rackham building? I liv thr and slp btwn th hours of 3pm and 12am whn my mdicin is working. Plas xcus typos, thr is a ky missing from my kyboard. Also, did somon us my kyboard? This won't b stood for anymor.
-Col. Mactimor

TEST

2004-07-15T11:29:00.000-05:00

Which Internet is this on? I wrote my first test in the Forest Room and now I can't find it.

TEST

2004-07-15T11:26:00.000-05:00

This is a test post.

Click on "Publish Post."

I Need to Teach You

2004-07-14T10:43:00.000-05:00

I need to teach you guys to use this. It's easy!

My pretty bad itch is getting worse.

Will This Work?

2004-07-10T10:23:00.000-05:00

Will this work? I'm trying to send a link of my grandkids that my son just sent. The big one is going to Michigan in the fall. Looks just like his dad, who looks just like his mom.

-Norm

This Beautiful Day

2004-07-10T10:09:00.000-05:00

Sitting in the courtyard just now, looking up at the bright blue sky, considering the beautiful wife of 55 years to whom I will make love later tonight, I just wanted to THANK GOD FOR AMERICA. We are in trying times these days. Red Lefe residents have seen trying times before, both at home and abroad. The Col. fought in either two or three wars I think. Tabby's family lost something like a third of their real estate holdings in the Great Depression. My store was burned in the riots. But we have prevailed because nothing is as strong as the spirit of this country. We sometimes want to complain, and yes it's hard to resist because it really does ache here and it really does itch there. And God knows it does. But THERE IS SO MUCH MORE REASON TO REJOICE. The families we have the friends, and the medications and other procedures. Call me a softie, I don't care. I call myself an optimist and a patriot, and a darn lucky man.

THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE ELECTION. THIS IS A STATEMENT OF EMOTION AND I THINK OF FACT.

-Norm

Test

2004-07-09T21:06:00.000-05:00

Hello,

I am posting for resident Col. Mactimor to see if his display name shows up. When he saw that his name was not displayed on the right he became quite irritable. I don't think I need to remind the staff of blogger.com that the Colonel served his country in three distinct wars and should be shown the respect he deserves, especially in regards to having his name displayed prominently on a web log. The Colonel is currently in the rec room enjoying a screening of the 2003 Denzel Washington starrer "Out Of Time" and would very much like to begin posting on to the web log soon. Hopefully this post will have his display name and not mine. Thank you for your time.
-Nick Nadel, the Colonel's son-in-law

Editor-in-Lefe

2004-07-09T13:13:00.000-05:00

Red Lefe Calls!
I cannot drive.
These beig-ed walls!
I'm still alive.

Alzheimer's curse
Is creeping Lethe's womb.
This place is worse,
Named Red Lefe's Tomb!

Take that Edward Lear!

-Coates Morris Lloyd

Typing Services Available

2004-07-09T12:50:00.000-05:00

If any of you are having trouble typing your entries, let me know! I can still stroke the keys pretty well. Just a small fee. Kidding!

-Norm